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How To Have Empathy During A Pandemic

By Jason

It’s been tough to scroll through my Facebook and Twitter Main Feeds lately.

Before everything started, I kept seeing people posting about how awful social media was going to be once the election season kicked into full gear.

And then our current situation happened, and it seems as if our feeds are worse now than they’ve ever been.

I’ve had to get liberal with the Unfollow and Block buttons lately. I’ve seen more hate, more finger pointing, and more name calling than ever before.

There seems to be 3, Main “camps” that everyone is split into.

There’s Camp #1: Concerned about COVID-19.

There’s Camp #2: Concerned about our Economy.

And there’s Camp #3: Concerned about our Civil Liberties.

And of course, there’s overlap between the camps.

Which camp am I in?

I made this little Venn Diagram to show you exactly where I stand on the matter.

———–

In my daughters’ Elementary School, they read Stephen Covey’s “7 Habits Of Happy Kids”.

They’re plastered all over the walls.

My favorite Habit Of Happy Kids?

Habit #5: “Seek first to understand, and then to be understood.”

This is taught to every child who walks through the doors, starting in Kindergarten.

Kindergarten…

“Seek first to understand…”

Meaning, before you start yelling about your own, personal situation, first, attempt to understand those who are in a different situation.

Said in a different way?

Have empathy for your neighbors.

Empathy – the ability to see the world from another’s point of view.

It’s a sign of emotional intelligence. And it defines us as humans. No other creatures on Earth show empathy and compassion for other living creatures.

It makes us unique.

And too often, when faced with adversity, we immediately become divisive, nasty, and we point fingers and name names.

———————–

Camp #1: Concerned about COVID-19

I’m most definitely in this camp.

Since before Day #1 of our stay-at-home order, we’ve followed every rule to the very letter of the law in order to flatten the curve, slow the spread, and keep our family safe.

We haven’t left the house for anything other than food.

I’m the only one who’s actually left. Kate and my girls have stayed in the house the entire time, except for a few walks and/or bike rides.

Does the fact that I’m concerned about COVID-19 mean I’m not concerned about the economy?

Nope.

I’m very concerned about the economy. More on that in a minute.

Does the fact that I’m concerned about COVID-19 mean I’m not concerned about our Civil Liberties?

Not at all.

It simply means I’m concerned about COVID-19.

Nothing more.

I’m concerned about our family’s safety, the safety of my parents and in-laws, and my 93 year old Grandma.

I don’t want us, as a collective whole, to do things that will needlessly endanger any of us.

I don’t want any lives to be lost that can be prevented.

That’s what it means.

That’s it and that’s all.

But if you’re in this camp, and you’re screaming about “rednecks, hillbillies, and white trash” that are protesting our Civil Liberties being taken away, please refer back to Rule #5 of Happy Kids:

“Seek first to understand, and then to be understood”.

You are a part of the problem if you’re name calling.

You’re not a part of the solution.

You are amplifying the already present divide in this country… and you’re making it worse.

Just because you’re concerned about civil liberties or the economy doesn’t mean you’re anything.

In fact, it likely means your job is gone. Your pay is slashed. Your business has taken a massive hit, or could be going under.

Your very life you’ve worked so hard to build is in jeopardy.

Have some empathy.

That’s not an easy situation to be in…

—————–

Camp #2: Concerned about our Economy.

I’m most definitely in this camp, too.

The first weekend of the quarantines sent an absolute flood of client cancellations into my inbox.

And sales, which are always brisk for fitness during this time of the year, dried up overnight.

Our family’s well being is determined by the private economy.

My wife works for the automotive industry, which has been all but shut down.

And I work in the fitness industry, which has also taken a massive hit.

I understand fully that what I do is a “luxury” for most people. And as such, it’s the first thing to go during times of economic crisis.

That, combined with the current state of my wife’s profession, makes me anxious and nervous.

And it makes me want to see the economy reopen earlier than later.

Does that mean I want people to die who don’t have to die?

No, it does not.

Does that mean I revere the Almighty Dollar as my God, instead of Human Life?

Of course not.

Does that mean I want nurses to be in danger, patients to be left in halls who need treatment, or bodies to pile up in makeshift morgues, just so we can get back to earning a buck?

Nothing could be further from the truth.

It simply means I’m anxious and worried about my family’s current situation, and I hope we can find a proper solution quickly.

Nothing more.

If you’re concerned about the economy like me, and you’re calling everyone concerned about COVID-19 a “Commie, a socialist, or a fan of 1984”, please refer back to Rule #5 of Happy Kids:

“Seek first to understand, and then to be understood”.

Once again, you are a part of the problem, not the solution.

You are further dividing our great country by your mean spirited rhetoric.

Just because you’re concerned about COVID-19 doesn’t mean you want to see other people lose their jobs.

Or go into foreclosure.

Or lose their homes.

Or worse.

In fact, it likely means you – or people you know – are working on the front lines. You’ve probably seen the death and destruction of COVID-19 up close and personal.

You’ve heard the horror stories and perhaps witnessed them in real life.

And you find it terrifying.

And as such, you don’t want to see any more pain and suffering at the expense of re-opening society too early.

I get that, totally. And I agree with it fully, even though I’m concerned about our economy as well.

If you’re concerned about the Economy and you’re yelling at everyone concerned about COVID-19, have some empathy.

And try to understand the struggles of your fellow citizens.

These are not easy situations to be in…

————————

Camp #3: Concerned about our Civil Liberties.

Yep… I’m 100% in this camp as well…

But not for the reasons you would assume.

Do I think it’s an overreach for our Governor to ban the things she’s banned?

Yes, I do.

I don’t even own a boat, nor a second home Up North.

But when I heard that basic, human rights to property – that we own – were now officially declared “off limits”, I have an issue with that.

If we pay taxes to our government because we own a particular piece of land or asset, it’s our right to use said asset.

I’m extremely uncomfortable with a precedent being set that at any time, our government can step in and restrict the use of our own, private property while keeping every tax dollar we’ve given them.

Your opinion may differ.

But that is mine.

But… just because I feel this way, does that mean I think we should all disregard the quarantine to stick it to “The Man”?

No, it does not.

Does that mean I think we should grab pitch forks and torches and storm the Capital Building during a pandemic?

No, it does not.

Does that mean I think we should all congregate together, sharing spit to hurry up the spread of COVID-19 to get everything over with?

Because it’s “just the flu” and a massive government conspiracy?

Hell no… most definitely not…

It simply means it’s my belief that our government should interfere as little as possible to achieve a desired result.

And it’s my feeling that they haven’t accomplished that goal.

Simple as that.

Nothing more, nothing less.

If you find yourself upset and incensed at those who protested in Lansing yesterday, and you’re name calling and posting spiteful articles, you are a part of the problem.

And not a part of the solution.

If this is you, please refer back to Rule #5 of Happy Kids:

“Seek first to understand, and then to be understood”.

The protesters weren’t Neo-Nazis, skinheads, scum bags, MAGA-blowhards, or anything else.

They are simply people who are uneasy with the government so swiftly coming in and handing down massive edicts that either don’t pass the full logic test – or are shaky at best.

Nothing more.

————————–

All the name calling in the world isn’t going to change our situation.

It’s simply going to pour gasoline on the already red-hot fire our great nation is feeling right now.

I would love more than anything to see these 3, distinct camps come together and find a common solution.

But I know it’s not going to come from Armchair Joe, or Sittin-On-Her-Couch Karen, the notorious Facebook Experts.

It’s going to come from finding common ground.

Seeing the point of view of someone else.

And having empathy for other people.

Kindness always wins, above all else.

If you find yourself distinctly in ONE camp – and only one camp, there’s a reason for that.

And that reason is simple:

Your world view is short-sighted.

You’re living in an echo-chamber of only like-minded people.

Social media outlets naturally do this. When you click something, you’ll be seen more of the same thing.

It’s how social media works – their goal is to keep you on their app above all else – and they do it VERY well.

Before you call people names, insult them, yell at them, or challenge their intelligence, I’d suggest you take a step back.

Turn off the news for a bit.

Call a friend.

Tell them you love them.

Take a walk.

Meditate.

And come back when you feel refreshed and you can refrain from being negative.

And of course, when all else fails, please refer back to Rule #5 of Happy Kids:

“Seek first to understand, and then to be understood”.

Your life will be much better off as a result of following this simple mantra, which is taught to all children.

In Kindergarten.

Be safe, and be well.

-Jason

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Hi. I'm Jason.

I'm a Dad, a Husband, a Teacher, and a Fitness Coach.

I help normal people get lean, the right way.

No woo-woo, no nonsense, no BS.

Just pure results.

Contact me at: jason@anymanfitness.com

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